Inside my brain . . .

My links are fucked up and I'm dying to put up a link list, just understand that I have not chosen to not have a link list, I just really don't know how to reinstate it and that sucks. I'm working on it. Anyway . . .

Can you hear this song in your head by Frankie Valli.

Oh, what a night.
Late December back in '63.
What a very special time for me,
'Cause I remember what a night.

Oh, what a night.
You know, I didn't even know her name,
But I was never gonna be the same.
What a lady. What a night.

Oh, I. I got a funny feeling when she walked
In the room and I,
As I recall it ended much too soon.

Oh, what a night,
Hypnotizing, mesmerizing me.
She was everything I dreamed she'd be.
Sweet surrender, what a night!

I felt a rush like a rolling bolt of thunder
Spinnin' my head around and taking my body under.
Oh, what a night!

Oh, I. I got a funny feeling when she walked
In the room and I,
As I recall it ended much too soon.

Oh, what a night.
Why'd it take so long to see the light?
Seemed so wrong, but now it seems so right.
What a lady, what a night!

I felt a rush like a rolling bolt of thunder
Spinnin' my head around and taking my body under.
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do.)
Oh, what a night!
(Do, do, do, do, do. Do, do, do, do, do, do

That song is in my head right now. You too can find the lyrics to any song in your head by just going to the link connected to this title.

If I were amazing . . .

this is what I would do. Not only would I do yoga everyday, I would share the love by updating my yogadenada blog regularly, imparting all my insight about stay-at-home yoga with the masses, dropping in on my readers to help adjust poses, dim lights, light incense and rearrange artwork in order to get a proper view for balance. I would sew everyday and post pics regularly to my angrykitty blog. My wardrobe would be a collection of thrift digs, ripped and resewn and cool skirts made from the cloth in the sale bin at the local fabric store. I would be slowly starting my novel about growing up in the 70's with the original divorcee, simultaneously studying magazines from the 70's to do my cultural background work. Enlightened by my research, I would share the information by scanning the cool ads and photos from these great magazines from the 70's (Life, Better Homes & Gardens, etc.) and posting them in my blog. I would regularly release my inner emotional struggles through poetry and I would be studying creative writing, typesetting and design in order to provide myself with a skill that would enhance my money making abilities. Finally, I would buy a home here in lovely Crestview, and proceed to build a fantastic Dwellish, environmentally-correct home that we could live in until Jake and (maybe, a someday, Lola-type, if we can muster the energy to actually try again) other sibling type graduate from school. Oh yeah, I would also have a veggie and herb garden and maybe do a bit of knitting on the side. Instead, I do yoga, do some walking, clean the house all the time, hang out with Jake, read lots of magazines and drink wine, oh, I forgot, I WORK. FUCK WORKING. I hate working. We women took on toooooooo much when we said we would hold down the household, bear children and work. Who ever came up with this women's lib stuff is a pain in my ass. I'd just as soon go back to my grandma's world. Argh. So frustrating. I am channeling Grandma, I know she's out there, watching over me, hopefully she can give me some insight. On a lighter note, another thing I am doing is attempting to walk my ass off for the 3dayorg walk for Breast Cancer in October. Hold on to your ass because what I'm about to say may shock you. I am going to walk 60 miles in 3 days. Ouch. I walked 7 miles last night and I had to sleep in until 8:30am today. Yes, I know that's funny considering I used to sleep until noon regularly, but these days 6:30am is sleeping in, so, yeah, I basically slept all day today. Nonetheless, my dear friend Denise and I are planning to raise $2200.00 individually and walk in the 3dayorg walk. I know it's going to be awe inspiring and amazing and Joel said that he would do it if I got preggers. So, I have no idea what kind of effect that will have on him. Should be excellent. You sleep in tents at night along the way. I think it might hurt a bit because 7 miles is a push, but I'm going to try to build up to 15 miles in the next few months. Maybe it will get rid of this bellyo'mine that I've been lugging around for a year now. I also wanted to do it because I have experienced the shock of breast cancer in a very close relationship, a friend of mine who survived an agressive attack, but also because I never knew my beautiful Grandma Oma who was taken from my mom at a very young age by the ravages of breast cancer. Because of that, cancer is a fear that both my mom and I live with. If you are interested in the 3dayorg walk, hit the title of this blog and it will link you to how to get involved. You don't have to do it in Texas, you can do it all over this great land we call America, the United States. Oh yes. Need . . .more . . .coffee.

Happy Valentine's Day

I know all you guys who are married and such think you have it figured out about love and all but really . . you just never know. I thought I would be with my first husband forever and on the day of our divorce I actually thought we would get back together. No. That will never happen and we were not together forever, only 14 frigging years of my life. No big deal. Really, I thought that my boyfriend after Mark was the love of my life. My perfect fella, but no, he was not the final one for me, though he was good and I do still care for him. We remain friends and that is most important, kind of sacred. No, I think I have it figured out with Joel, it's called kids and sex (oh, I get it, trouble, sex makes kids). For Joel and I, it's "We will make this work for the Boy." But mostly, he continues to be my best friend. The one I want to be with at the end of the day, even if we have fought all day, and we do fight all day. But really, I knew we were the one when I put our names into the love calculator and it gave us a 99 percent chance. I mean Mark and I had a 33 percent chance. That says it all. You should really try it. Just click on the title of this entry and you to can get the closest thing to truth about your love. Meanwhile, do yourself a favor and go get some love on this holiest of love days. Joel and I took yesterday off and had a whole day of doing what we used to do when we didn't have anything to do. If you are married and have kids, you should do this regularly. If you arn't married and you don't have kids but you are in a relationship, you should appreciate your time together. AND. . .if you aren't married and you are single, hell, you should go do whatever the fuck you please because you can and you can never know how nice that is until it's not there anymore. So, go sign up for a 9-day yoga retreat today. That's what I would do. Happy Valentine's Day.